Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Please Reconcile

Dear Friends & BJU Alumni,

If you have already "
signed" the Please Reconcile letter, then thank you.

If you would like to "
sign" the Please Reconcile letter or learn more about Please Reconcile, then please go to please-reconcile.org.

...

During our first semester at the University in the early '90s, my friend (Eric) -- who is half caucasian & half oriental -- was called to the Dean of Men's office. There Dean Tony Miller confronted Eric about the evils of inter-racial dating of which we were completely ignorant. To the best of my knowledge, Eric had not gone on any dates yet; so I do not believe this action was in response to an inter-racial date. (Was every student called to such a meeting or was it just the minorities?) However, I was so astonished by this information that I asked Dean Miller for the University's scriptural support for such a position. He responded by directing us to Genesis 10:1, which states, "Now these are the generations of the sons of Noah, Shem, Ham, and Japheth: and unto them were sons born after the flood."

At this point Dean Miller must have detected our puzzled expressions despite the light of such clear and convincing revelation because he then patiently explained that Shem, Ham, and Japheth were the fathers of the yellow, black, and white races respectively. He followed by artfully unfolding that God, Himself, separated these three races at the Tower of Babel. His finale was the inescapable conclusion that humanity's division at Babel was God's plan and that we should not frustrate God's plan by attempting to reunite the races.

Although this explanation is less than satisfactory from both logical and hermeneutical standpoints, Eric quickly moved on to the practical implications of such a philosophy by dropping the bomb that he was half Shem and half Japheth according to this reckoning. This news appeared to catch Dean Miller off guard. (He may have been under the mistaken impression that Eric was completely of Asian descent.) However, he soon recovered, and with wisdom that Solomon could only marvel at, announced that since Eric was 50% white & 50% yellow he (Eric) must choose then and there to date either white or yellow young ladies and never to recant once his choice was made.

Of course, Eric immediately decided to date only young ladies who were of the seed of Japheth and to swear off ever taking a Shemitess to an artist series, the couch emporium, or other dating venue. He later confided in me that his hasty but well-thought decision was based on the assumption that he would be dating at all and his cogent observation that white girls outnumbered oriental girls by about 1000 to 1 at BJU. Thus Satan's plans to reunite humanity and resume work on that wicked tower were once again thwarted by steadfast dedication to unwritten University policy and the quick thinking of a singular dean.


...

I don't know whether to laugh or cry about it, but my post (above) is -- to the best of my recollection -- an absolutely accurate recounting of what transpired on that day. I am no writer, and I certainly could not make up such a tragically amusing scenario.

7 comments:

simplegifts3 said...

It is sad. And it is this kind of thing that gives Christians a really bad name among the unsaved.

The Savage said...

Precisely, Lynn! We're praying the "powers that be" see it that way as well... enough to do something about "public perception."

Lisa said...

Well, I don't know what to say! My jaw hit the floor when I read that. Paul might have told me about that way back when, but I have forgotten. That is so unbelievable! Poor Eric, and anyone else that was subjected to such foolishness.

The Savage said...

In anyone is interested in my personal take on this issue, read here.

Unknown said...

Is this story about Eric Laurio? He was in my prayer group in 92. We were both freshmen. He was a great guy and very funny and this is a true story.

The Savage said...

Yup. He and the Sheep Dog were buddies from pre-BJU days.

Unknown said...

I have been telling several funny stories over the years that involved Eric. The one you told was one of them. Another one was when Dr. Bob III tried to confront Eric about some rule he broke and Eric blew him off and said "who are you?". My personal favorite was when Eric called Mr. Henry, a dormitory supervisor, a "butthead" while in the disciple committee line.