tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1096222976291203462.post5816039911100341981..comments2023-04-01T10:51:43.447-04:00Comments on The Savage's Lair: Loving Our Kids on PurposeThe Savagehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/15906014150752232747noreply@blogger.comBlogger8125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1096222976291203462.post-92071910797305346512014-05-27T12:05:35.078-04:002014-05-27T12:05:35.078-04:00I viewed the entire video series and, although the...I viewed the entire video series and, although the goal of training your children to be motivated by the value of relationships, rather than the fear of punishment is laudable, this does not necessarily lead to a) the conclusion that corporal punishment, properly deployed, is ineffectual in support of that object, or b) adoption of the training method of choice-absolutism that Danny Silk presents as authoritative.<br /><br />Silk presents some very clever examples of how to outwit your child into making the right choice, by leading the child to recognize that they will thereby obtain a result that makes them happy. The natural way of a child is to seek his own happiness, and Silk's method may make a child adept at making choices that serve this self-interest, but I don't see how this leads to a heart that is motivated by the love of virtue, or to conviction that will prevail when temptation or persecution offers a choice of pain for faithfulness and pleasure for default. <br /><br />As the reviewer points out, Silk does not rigorously (or even non-rigorously, from what I observed) interpret scripture with other scripture to establish his thesis. However, I am less disturbed by Silk's de-emphasis of biblical chastisement -- because of the real needs of adoptive or foster parents to have an alternative that won't result in the State taking away their children -- than I am alarmed by the thin reed of scriptural support for the methodology that Silk claims fulfills a scriptural imperative. That method is giving choices to your children about everything.<br /><br />Throughout the video series, I kept waiting for Silk to clarify that his choices uber alles method was not intended for very young children, and should be introduced progressively in proportion to the child's increasing maturity. I waited in vain. Tragically, well-meaning parents who follow this approach will be training their child to falsely believe that he possesses wisdom and autonomy that he does not actually possess, and will find themselves, in due course, with children who are wise in their own eyes, of whom the Bible says, "...there is more hope for a fool." Considering the currency that "Loving Our Kids On Purpose" has in the churches, it is sickening to contemplate the harvest from these seeds.Larry Nasellihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04788077287521193463noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1096222976291203462.post-59789945677444680262013-01-12T23:44:42.586-05:002013-01-12T23:44:42.586-05:00You might like to go back and read the book he say...You might like to go back and read the book he says he worked with foster parents who were unable to spank and needed help getting through to their foster child. He and his wife have 1 daughter and 2 sons. Wonder what else you missed while skimming. My family of 6 has changed dramatically under the guidance of his books and videos. From my 2 year old up to my 14 year old. Its amazing what can happen when you quick punishing and start allowing consequences. Oh and he does believe in spanking when appropriate. Reread the book. Watch the videos.Angiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09073642924854896418noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1096222976291203462.post-9638261230407608952013-01-12T23:44:06.309-05:002013-01-12T23:44:06.309-05:00You might like to go back and read the book he say...You might like to go back and read the book he says he worked with foster parents who were unable to spank and needed help getting through to their foster child. He and his wife have 1 daughter and 2 sons. Wonder what else you missed while skimming. My family of 6 has changed dramatically under the guidance of his books and videos. From my 2 year old up to my 14 year old. Its amazing what can happen when you quick punishing and start allowing consequences. Oh and he does believe in spanking when appropriate. Reread the book. Watch the videos.Angiehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09073642924854896418noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1096222976291203462.post-41594992021854427742010-03-16T03:52:08.409-04:002010-03-16T03:52:08.409-04:00Hey Anon--
Sorry to be tardy in responding.
My hu...Hey Anon--<br />Sorry to be tardy in responding.<br /><br />My husband wrote this review after reading the entire book; I asked him & he said there's no mention of such an idea in the book. I've only read (large) chunks of the book, but not seen any mention of sin in heaven either. So I'm afraid I can't be much help. Have you actually seen him say that in a DVD?<br /><br />I don't think it's relevant to your question, but one thing that did strike me as odd was the notation on the copyright page.<br /><br /><i>Please note that Destiny Image's publishing style capitalizes certain pronouns in Scripture that refer to the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, and may differ from some publishers' styles. Take note that the name satan and related names are not capitalized. We choose not to acknowledge him, even to the point of violating grammatical rules.</i> <br /><br />Okaaaaaay. That was a new one on me. But, yeah. Not relevant to your question.The Savagehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15906014150752232747noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1096222976291203462.post-34568169435420411592010-03-04T05:01:26.242-05:002010-03-04T05:01:26.242-05:00I was just googling reviews on his book because ev...I was just googling reviews on his book because every one seems to think this man is amazing. He however in his DVD lectures says that there is sin in heaven so we need to prepare our kids to make good choices so they don't sin in heaven. This goes against every thing the bible teaches us about heaven. I'm curious on your opion about this.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1096222976291203462.post-64325965273293786262010-02-16T00:32:14.412-05:002010-02-16T00:32:14.412-05:00Thanks for the detailed review. I have the book, ...Thanks for the detailed review. I have the book, started reading it but (even though I have friends who were encouraged/inspired by it) it wasn't clicking with me when I started it. . . <br /><br />Now I'll have some interesting things to look for if/when I do finish reading it.<br /><br />(And. . . can I say. . . one of my pet peeves with a lot of parenting books is the lack of sound use of Scripture? Maybe it is because I have friends who are so careful with their use of the Bible, that I expect that from everyone. . .)TulipGirlhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/10491713586488210547noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1096222976291203462.post-62642185263868519642010-02-13T12:01:17.722-05:002010-02-13T12:01:17.722-05:00I think people's reactions to the book are dri...I think people's reactions to the book are driven by what they're looking for in the book.<br /><br />Because Silk assumes his audience already agrees with his theological position ("we're in the New Covenant so all need for punishment has already been paid for"), he makes almost no effort to support his non-punitive parenting paradigm from Scripture. <br /><br />So if you agree (that punishment and parenting don't belong in the same sentence), his book offers <i>a lot</i> of good practical ideas for parenting in that paradigm. If, however, you're looking for a Scriptural defense/support of non-punitive parenting... Silk's book won't help.The Savagehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15906014150752232747noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1096222976291203462.post-76602981244266963502010-02-12T11:07:16.331-05:002010-02-12T11:07:16.331-05:00Thanks for the in-depth review! I have heard good...Thanks for the in-depth review! I have heard good things about this book but hadn't encountered it personally. I'm sorry to hear it is so scripturally vacuous!Kathyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05921654315127035691noreply@blogger.com